It's a shame. NO- it's a celebration!

I realized recently (...as in within the last 10 mins...), that most of my life I have felt ashamed.

• Ashamed of my skin color.

• Ashamed of the texture, thickness, and curl of my hair.

• Ashamed of my name.

• Ashamed of my family.

• Ashamed of my house.

• Ashamed of my flute-playing abilities. 

• Ashamed of my drawing abilities.

• Ashamed of my baseball-playing abilities.

• Ashamed of my basketball-playing abilities.

• Ashamed of my cheerleading abilities.

• Ashamed of my dancing abilities.

• Ashamed of my daydreams.

• Ashamed of my body.

• Ashamed of my being a band geek.

• Ashamed of my passion for Shakespeare.

• Ashamed of my femininity.

• Ashamed of my vulnerability.

• Ashamed of my desire to want more.

• Ashamed of my thirst/quest to learn more.

• Ashamed of my unknown/undecided future.

• Ashamed of my status as a transfer-student.

• Ashamed of my biracial herritage.

• Ashamed of my sexual orientation.

• Ashamed of my openness and adaptability to try/experience new things.

• Ashamed of my religion.

• Ashamed of my spirituality.

• Ashamed of my two jobs.

• Ashamed of my three jobs.

• Ashamed of being dumped... again... and again...

• Ashamed of being forgotton. 

• Ashamed of being left behind. 

• Ashamed of being intentionally left out.

• Ashamed of being too old.

• Ashamed of being too young.

• Ashamed of being bored.

• Ashamed of being poor.

• Ashamed of having people skills.

• Ashamed of not having science skills. 

• Ashamed of being a late bloomer.

• Ashamed of playing with makeup.

• Ashamed of my dirty f*cking mouth.

• Ashamed of my enthusiasm/zeal and zest for life.

• Ashamed of my line process.

• Ashamed of my one job.

• Ashamed of my strength(s).

• Ashamed of my weakness(es).

• Ashamed of my singleness.

• Ashamed of my greatness.

• Ashamed of being/feeling ashamed.

It's a shame that there is all this shame!

For each one of my shames (listed above from elementary school through college), I can vividly recall a sense of joy and contentment; feelings of pleasure and inclusion, accomplishment and freedom. 

For each one of my shames (listed above from elementary school through college), I can vividly recall a comment or statement or scenario or conversation with someone who said something to me that made me feel feel horrible about myself, and therefore ashamed. 

It's funny how wisdom manifests itself over time.

Most of my shames (listed above from elementary school through college), no longer cripplingly embarrass me.

Most of my shames (listed above from elementary school through college), are now causes for most of my celebrations!